Category Archives: acceptance

acceptance, beauty, cherish, inspirational, sacred, spiritual

Just Because I’m Old

June 19, 2023 ravenwolfsong 5 Comments

I write this blog in honor of my most cherished Mamacita, who will be 84 years beautiful this August 2023.

I write it based on 20 years plus experience of being a homemaker-companion for the elderly. I write this for all of you who may be getting up in years, and for the beloved people in your life who are now considered to be an elder.

Lastly, I write this as a gift to my future self.

Growing old is an inevitable part of life and depending on culture, society, experiences, upbringing, and personal values, we will face these grand milestones for ourselves, and for those we encounter, in a way that reflects our own unique expression and understanding.

I have spent a lot of time with the older community over the years as a caregiver. My job was to help people live in their homes independently by assisting them with some of the things they were no longer able to do on their own, such as transportation, grocery shopping, errands, bathing, meal preparation, and housework.

Most of the people I assisted suffered with health issues, and several struggled with different stages of dementia from mild to severe. Almost all of them were lonely. Because of the nature of my job, it was easy to become close. Many of my clients became very dear to me, and I will always think of them with great fondness.

My dear friend Geri; sitting on my deck, meeting Skadi, and at the flea market! We always had fun together, and I loved her very much. I was blessed to be with her as she took her last breath. I have many sweet memories of our time together.

My mama, not too long ago when she was still driving.

Despite obvious job expectations, I quickly learned there was an unwritten and highly valuable desire my elder friends all shared in common. This basic human need was their emotional quest to be recognized as someone who still maintained sovereignty over themselves, regardless of their age, condition, abilities, hearing, or cognitive challenges.

Sovereignty: meaning dominion over one’s self – emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually. Perfection is not a requirement.

In the presence of an elder, understand they have lived a wealth of stories, filled with triumphs, heartaches, incredible loss, love, humor, grief, adventures, and countless other happenings that we can’t even imagine.

My mother’s older sister Yolanda, who departed our world in her 30’s, I know she misses her every day.

For someone to have made it to a certain age means they have encountered numerous obstacles and miracles. Their physical self has done its best to survive a multitude of seasons, and most assuredly their bodies have acquired the scars and discomfort to show for it.

My mother’s parents, Frances & Luis, my dear Nana and Tata

Isn’t it true for most everyone, that as we grow in years, though our countenance, bodies, and ways-of-being continually transform, inside we are each the unique person we have always been. Our inner self remains the same.

It’s a crazy juxtaposition this duality of being a human.

My mother and her first love Jessie. They reconnected as elders; their relationship was very special. He departed our world several years ago, and I know she misses him often.

Just because I’m old; I no longer move the same and may be slower than you like. Perhaps I’m not as focused as you wish for me to be.

Just because I’m old, I won’t always hear you, and my vision is not as clear. You may have to repeat yourself, but please do so with respect. I can’t help the way I am.

Just because I’m old, I may tell you the same story over and over again, and perhaps I’ve forgotten certain other ones you wish for me to know.

Just because I’m old, understand my heart aches with loss for people, places, and the things I can no longer do.

Just because I’m old, time for me feels different, and often the days and nights seem to all morph into one. I am familiar with what it’s like to watch my life slowly simmer.

Just because I’m old. I’m no longer as busy, and my priorities may look different than how they used to be.

Just because I’m old, I have withstood the pain of time from missing all those I have lost and know intimately the sorrow of having to say goodbye.

Just because I’m old, I will try my best to stay strong, to celebrate the joys and happy times. I still need to feel loved and accepted, just the way I am.

Just because I’m old, please be patient, and treat me with kindness. Remember to cherish my wisdom for I will not always be here.

Just because I’m old, know I have traveled many roads, and am weary from all I have endured. Realize my thoughts and memories can often feel unclear.

Just because I’m old, know I am a Sovereign Being of Light. However tattered and torn I may appear; my essence and beauty remain.

Please don’t think of me as different, just because I’m old.

I saw this photo at a record shop, I don’t know who she is, but I love her vibe!

Thankfully my mother is in mostly good health, although she does suffer from some serious ailments at times. She is no longer driving, mostly because the roads aren’t as easy to navigate as they once were. All of those crazy California drivers! Her mind and wit are as sharp as always, and she still has many things she enjoys such as gardening, decorating, collecting crystals and treasures, reading, and watching her kdramas. She has fallen several times, thankfully nothing too serious. I try not to scold her for climbing on stepping stools, and for being so independent that she doesn’t ask for help. I tell her it’s not scolding, just encouraging! She could use a hearing aid or two……otherwise she is doing well. We had a long talk the other day which initiated some of this writing. I was able to discuss the idea of grieving as one gets older ( I took a special class on this) so I think it helped her to understand some of her emotional challenges. My mother has always been my dearest soul mate, and I miss her all of the time. Hopefully I can go visit with her soon.

I love you my sweet mama and count every day as a blessing that you are still here.

In Timeless Peace,

Raven

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acceptance, beauty, inspirational, spiritual, The Divine

In The Darkness

June 6, 2023 ravenwolfsong 2 Comments

I like to go outside at night before I drift off to sleep. I cherish the ritual of releasing the happenings of my day by looking out into the vast sky. It helps me to keep things in perspective, and also reminds me of the miracle of our existence.

It’s usually pretty late when I finally step outside, which makes it extra quiet, and in the darkness, nothing remains the same.

Last night, the moon was gentle bright – – low behind the trees.

I know every inch of my yard since I have lived here for over 30 years.

First, there is a well-worn path, made from the running back and forth of our beloved dogs beginning from before my babies were even born. Their names were Wolfie, then Nico, Timber and Aragon, and now our sweet Skadi.

Over the years my children and I naturally followed in the same hollow furrow which led from our front door… all the way around the deck…and into the back.

As we grew older the path became dirt – – smoothed by our footsteps. Often, I traverse it in the dark, each little divot memorized, the earth welcoming under my feet.

In one corner of our yard stands a Curly Willow tree. There is a large open area between her low hanging branches that seems to beckon me in for a hug, and so I cooperate, my back against her trunk.

I rest, leaning into her comforting strength, and look up through her branches.

My son Kai and I created a Woodland Zen Garden in the shady emptiness of our yard this Spring. It’s a work in progress but we have transformed a huge area into a retreat of beauty and peace.

Skadi keeping us company, she loves to lay in the fresh dirt

We have placed steppingstones and several large white rocks around its wandering borders. This helps me to see their glow at night as the moon shines upon them like beacons of light so I don’t stumble.

In the darkness I meander, my steps careful and silent. Sometimes I hear the Owls call to each other from across the trees. The wildlife around our lake serenades me as I place each foot mindfully.

There have been a few times where the inky blackness and a sudden strange noise send me scurrying back into the house. My imagination summoning up every scary story I’ve ever heard. More often though, I’m able to remain calm, safe in my familiarity.

Each season has its challenges, especially winter when I’m forced to limit how far I go into the darkness. The weather, the cycles of the moon, and the brightness of the stars, all influence my time spent outdoors.

I learn a lot from my escapades.

The circle of life continues, with or without us. The coming of night is an inevitable truth, and sometimes it happens before we are ready to let go of our day.

We can’t always see clearly what is right there before us, and even in the expected surroundings we may not always know what lies ahead.

It’s a fine balance to breathe in the uncertainty while embracing the comfort of the same.

The rocks, trees, and animal kingdom are our steadfast companions.

Flowers still bloom – – even in the darkness.

In Midnight Zen Peace,

Raven

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acceptance, beauty, inspirational, nature, spiritual, The Divine

Alchemy

November 19, 2022 ravenwolfsong 3 Comments

In pieces I fall, only to remain whole.

The sky has been extra beautiful lately. I think it’s because of the autumn cold, it makes everything clear and bright. I can see so many stars in the canvas over my house, especially now that the leaves have fallen, and I can gaze through the once covered branches.

In my wholeness, I am many.

I used to think I was one, but then I realized how fragmented I really am. I am the sum of my stories, each separate, complete on their own, yet somehow all blending into me. I used to think I was one, but instead I am a multitude. I am alchemy.

In my search for peace, I sought to remove the slivers of tales that still pierce my inner core. Only to find they have embedded in my dreams, with no hint of beginning or end, forever to reside in the velvet beauty of me. I am forced to live with the damage they have wrought, to allow my flesh to heal over sharpened tips. Like a rose, fragrant and divine, I am a gift, protected by my thorns.

In the light of day, I search the open sky, peering through the branches, I see nothing but bits of clouds floating by. The universe is filled with a multitude of stars, fragments of holy fire, all coming together to create the wholeness of celestial delight. Constellations and planets, dancing through infinity, each separate, complete on their own, yet somehow blending into one.

The universe and I,

In pieces we may fall,

only to remain whole.

Alchemy: https://www.dictionary.com/browse/alchemy

A form of chemistry and speculative philosophy practiced in the Middle Ages and the Renaissance and concerned principally with discovering methods for transmuting baser metals into gold and with finding a universal solvent and an elixir of life.

any magical power or process of transmuting a common substance, usually of little value, into a substance of great value.

any seemingly magical process of transforming or combining elements into something new

In Alchemistic Peace,

May we Dance,

Always, Raven

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acceptance, beauty, inspirational, nature, synchronicity

Butterfly Dance

July 27, 2022 ravenwolfsong 3 Comments

Today is my day to wander and roam,

today is my day I choose to stay home.

Barefoot, I walk in my house and my yard,

Enjoying my solitude,

with my dog as my guard.

The minutes tick by

in a sweet melting swirl,

The sun soon to set

so night may unfurl

That’s all the rhyming I have in me right now:)

It’s been a while since I sat down to write. I’m not quite sure why it’s been this long. I often consider writing about many topics or significant events in my life but in the actual moments I haven’t the energy, and later, much later, when I edit those thoughts in my head, there aren’t very many words left to type out.

Today is my day of solitude, although that includes my great big dog Skadi, so I am not completely alone. I love the peace and quiet to check out and just be Zen. It’s a beautiful day, I am writing this on my deck as we speak, feet up on a chair, a soft summer breeze, and a sleeping pup by my side. I already watered my house plants and flower gardens, and ummmm that’s really about it. I love doing nothing with bits of ‘maybe some-things’ thrown in. I find it especially healing.

https://youtu.be/jDvmG7nOyXY

This kind of day makes me think of the song, “Watching the Wheels” by John Lennon, I never heard this particular acoustic version before. The tempo is a little fast paced, but has a certain jaunty realness that makes me feel happy.

I have been pushed to be an adult more than usual these past months, but to counteract the seriousness of responsibilities, I have also focused on enjoying the beauty of my life, and the gentle space in which I dwell, both physically and spiritually.

On my walk I saw this bird sitting peacefully looking out over the lake. He didn’t even move as I shared this quiet moment with him. Kindred Spirits!

To grow my business of reading Tarot cards, which besides making beautiful art, is one of my favorite things to do, I have been posting daily collective energy readings on Tik-Tok, and Instagram. I promised myself I would do this every day for one month to see what happens. I would love to earn my income by being an artist and reading cards, such a lovely bohemian way of life that suits me perfectly.

I make art journals to sell at Renaissance Faires & other Festivals

Today’s reading was about loss, transformation and healing, you know, just the basics of life as usual. My intention when I read cards is to help people to connect with their own inner wisdom and guidance system, and always meant to inspire.

The oracle card for today had a butterfly on it, and represented balance and transformation. The meaning of the cards felt very clear to me this morning in a distant kind of way, but it wasn’t until later this afternoon when I meandered my way outside for the hundredth time to gaze at my flowers, that I personally ‘felt’ the message of the reading and how it applied to my own feelings of loss and grief. Eventually I was able to move through my sadness, and back over to the other side where I found my smile again, so all’s well that ends well, but what makes this moment so wonderful was the dancing butterfly that suddenly appeared before my eyes, reminding me of the very same card in today’s reading.

Sometimes synchronicity seems obvious only to you, which I think is how it’s supposed to be, otherwise where would the magic live, if it can’t be found in the every-day-ness.

@ravenightsong
Beautiful butterfly dance to go with this morning’s collective energy reading. #synchronicity #butterfly #collectivenergyreading
♬ Chopin Nocturne No. 2 Piano Mono – moshimo sound design

As I stood there marveling, and filming away, I thought this would be the very thing to break my writing sabbatical and share my video of *Her Winged Majesty* with all of my World Friends.

I have missed connecting with everyone, and I hope that life has been treating you well. Please take care of yourselves, and remember to have balance by also focusing on the beauty of life.

I visit this tree each day on my walk. I found this cracked egg shell and gave it to my tree-friend as a gift. It has been there now for several weeks.

Be Kind,

Be Considerate,

Be Love.

In Dancing Butterfly Peace,

Raven

Please follow and subscribe. I hope to be writing more often! Also check out my other posts & pages, especially my tarot information if you are interested in a reading.

acceptance, inspirational, relationships

Parting Is Such Sweet Sorrow

December 31, 2021 ravenwolfsong Leave a comment

Our lives are filled with goodbyes, some temporary and many forever. Eventually they will all enter the forever-and-ever category, but that’s a whole other blog. For now, I am going to write about the day to day ones we face with our family and friends.

Yesterday my son Deven and his delightful girlfriend Sophia, who I have become very close with, left for Maine to live in a beautiful cabin on the ocean for four months. It’s gorgeous, wild and free, and one of the most magical places I have ever visited. I am of course very happy for their temporary escape from the travails of life as we know it, and plan on staying with them for a couple of weeks sometime in the future. And just for your information, I have been officially invited as they adore my company, so I am not following them like some clingy mother ….

I have had to say goodbye numerous times to my boys over the last few years, as they left for college, or gone off on their adventures, and no matter how I emotionally prepare, it is always difficult. I fully see the big picture of how wonderful these opportunities are, and how good it is for them to be independent, to grow and be on their own, but that doesn’t take away the grief I feel every time as I watch them drive off into the sunset.

When I was a young girl, my mother took my siblings and I up to the San Francisco area to visit my uncle and his family. For some reason, she needed to leave us there for about a week, I am not sure of the details, but either way I was fine with her decision and happy to have this time with my cousins. At least, I thought so. It was not until later after saying our goodbyes in the driveway, when I saw her back up and head down the street, that I suddenly panicked my mother was leaving and I began running after her, my skinny little legs flying down the sidewalk, waving my arms and yelling for her to stop and take me with her. She had no idea this was happening and continued driving away until she was nothing but a tiny little speck in the distance. I gave up and stood there crying, then reluctantly turned around and walked back to the house. I ended up having a nice time, but will never ever forget the desperation and pain I felt in that moment as she left.

Flash forward to yesterday as I stood in another driveway, hugging my son goodbye, cradling his beloved face in my hands, and kissing his cheek, knowing he was about to drive over 7 hours away, and be gone for a significant amount of time. Quietly acknowledging there was nothing I could do, or even wanted to do for that matter, to hold him back. The same little girl who will always be a part of me, no matter how old I grow, was already preparing for the inevitable moment when my loved ones would get in the car and disappear into the distance. Thankfully I held it together, and did not go running after them, which wouldn’t have been good for anyone, especially me, as the driveway was covered with snow and very slippery.

Nevertheless, grief is grief.

Today I feel much better knowing they have safely arrived, and am already receiving videos and photos of them filling their water bottles at the natural spring, and later of my son sitting by the cozy wood stove.

This morning through the power of technology I was able to hear and view the misty gray ocean whispering over the slippery rocks, and can happily smile seeing that they are surrounded by such beauty.

Over the years, I have unfortunately experienced many other forms of goodbyes. Some with friends who I thought would be forever, some with lovers who I trusted would never leave, and even a few unspoken goodbyes from my close family members, which seems unimaginable even now. All have not been so cut and dried as the bittersweet one of yesterday, but instead drawn out, wrenched apart, ripped away, or faded slowly and painfully, inch by inch until nothing remains. These are the goodbyes that change you in ways that can never fully be healed, and at the very best, patched up with sticky glue, frayed scraps of fabric and bits of knotted string.

Some goodbyes may turn out to be for the best but this can be hard to fathom in the moments of leaving, and even more difficult to unravel later on. Our significant relationships are uniquely bound by shared experiences, time spent together, and mixed gently with the possibilities of future hopes and dreams. These are then tightly woven to create a beautiful tapestry, impossible to tease apart into separate categories of good or bad, right or wrong, happy or sad. It’s only in the finished piece where we can fully see how sacred everything has been in its entirety.

Today is the last day of 2021, and I am sure I speak for many that this year has been filled with an abundance of trials and tribulations, both personal and worldly, along with the beauty and magic that continually runs through it all. I am grateful for so much, too many things to list, but I happily say goodbye to this year and welcome in the new.

For everyone who has experienced the forever-and-ever goodbyes, or the sorrows which are way too deep to mention, please know you are loved and supported by myself, and hopefully others who are more tangible. It is good to seek help if you need more; there are many programs and people in this world who foster a place of generosity of spirit and love. I believe with all my heart in the perseverance and hope of humanity, and perhaps even more importantly, I believe in the divinity that binds us all.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKdknYaSHgE

things haven’t changed much….important message in the beginning!

Love is not ended through goodbyes, no matter how it may feel. Love is eternal and everlasting.

Happy Beautiful New Year

In Peace ~ Raven

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acceptance, nature

Wake Up, Wake Up, Wake Up

March 3, 2021 ravenwolfsong Leave a comment

Welcome dear world to the days of March. Time has inevitably moved on, reminding us how puny we are in the face of a living, breathing universe. I woke up sometime before dawn, only to realize just how close we in the Northern Hemisphere are to the end of winter; the subtle signs of an awakening spring have been minutely revealing themselves and softly proclaiming the season’s coming arrival.

I have been hearing it in the drip-drip-drop of the snow, and in the blustering of cleansing winds outside my window; I have felt it in the heart of night, with my blankets kicked to the side their weighted heaviness no longer needed for my comfort; I have tasted it in the sweetness of pure maple syrup on my lips, and yesterday I saw it in the flight of a family of bluebirds that I startled from a hedge of Juniper as I walked by.

Fluttering in unison into the branches of a nearby tree, dressed in celestial feathers, they watched as I stealthily moved close to take their picture–too late–by the time I had fumbled my cell phone into position, with my glasses perched precariously on my face, they nodded their little heads with excitement and quickly flew away.

In the darkness of shifting light, I lie here in my bed and watch the sun rise. I am not quite ready for winter to be over: I still crave the cover of ice and snow to muffle the sounds of the world. It’s been easy to stay quiet, hidden away from the hustle and bustle of what friendly weather will surely bring. Everything will change with the warmth of the sun, and I will be compelled, like the black bears of the forest, to leave the shelter of my cozy den.

Wake up, wake up, wake up. It’s time to rub the sleep from my eyes, and I am not ready.

The dream-time magic of winter can’t last forever, and soon the aura of my surroundings will be transformed from the misty hues of silvery grays and sparkling whites, into a wild symphony of unavoidable brilliancy in every color.

And I, withdrawn and curled up in the deepest of waking-slumber, must stumble out from the shadows of myself, and face the coming light.

Wake up, wake up, wake up. It’s time to rub the sleep from my eyes, and I am not ready.

In Misty Colored Peace, Raven

acceptance, humanity

One By One

December 3, 2020 ravenwolfsong Leave a comment

Years ago I had another blog and it was quite popular. I hadn’t formally written anything before, other than forced homework back in high school, and the notes we used to sneak during class, so I didn’t even know I could write. I was trying to persuade my then-teenage son how wonderful it would be if he started a blog. In the investigation of how they worked, I convinced myself. I wrote on and off for several tumultuous years, and it was very healing for me.

One day I discovered my audience had expanded from my small community here in the U.S. to several countries around the world, Singapore, Venezuela, Russia, Denmark, to name a few. How extraordinary to realize I was able to connect spiritually with someone from so far away, possibly even make a difference in how they greeted their day, or night. As citizens of the Universe, we circle around our own small territory, not really paying attention to anyone beyond our circumference. I think about the concept of strangers, unfamiliar and unknown, and I wonder how true that really is. We all need the same things to survive: food, water, shelter, fire. We have many of the same basic fears, hopes, and desires. Then why does it feel like someone on the other side of the world is so vastly different from *us*? Cultures, traditions, politics, religious beliefs, are outward manifestations, but inside we are first and foremost citizens of the earth. The link that binds us is our ability to love.

Somewhere as I write this, a father is gently smoothing the brow of his sleeping child, a youth is pondering their future, a mother prepares for a day of caring for her family, an elder dreams of times gone by. The world encompasses many diversities, with a multitude of stories being played out, but there is nothing emotionally new under the sun, we are the same somewhere. It’s difficult to grasp the sheer number of beings sharing our planet. Imagine, people with family and friends trying to survive, to be at peace, just like you and me. Seeing them as a complete stranger no longer makes sense. I think we can bridge this great divide by expanding our acceptance for others while still valuing the uniqueness of each individual. To open our mind to similarities within the universal consciousness. We are in this together.

Reaching out by our actions, words, or even our spirituality, through prayers, song, or verse. This is an amazing gift we take for granted. I for one, believe in the power of intention. Somehow by widening our understanding of others, even if it’s just mentally first, whether for people up the street or across the sea, we can cause a ripple effect. Perhaps by focusing on our common humanity and the beauty that binds us, we can awaken to a new way of connecting, and the idea of a stranger will just be someone we have yet to meet.

One by One

Thought by Thought

Prayer by Prayer,

Love can change the World.

In Peace, Raven